March 27, 2012

• What Comes Next?

  So, I have been at the place I'm at for 3 1/2 weeks now... no job (yet).  I have had at least 1 interview each week... but nobody wants me. I feel that it kind of ties in with Seedsower's most recent post about obesity, to be honest (though no employer would dare be truthful about that fact, of course.)

  I don't know what comes next - there's a few maybes... Maybe I will be granted an extension to stay at the shelter (hopefully they will see I've been doing all I can do to find work).  Maybe I will be referred to an organization that will provide housing while employed (though I don't know that I will have employment soon). Maybe one of these interviews will pan out into a decent paying job so that I can afford to start saving to get my own place ASAP.

  I have had some of my own fatalistic thoughts come back into play... feeling hopeless is not an option.... but it stands there and stares me in the face each day.

   

  I am wanting to run away... back to one of the places I used to live - where I at least know a person or two (and have access to decent counseling too)... I'm afraid of leaving though - because there is one person who might help but I would be imposing... and I don't know that I wouldn't put a strain on them, that I wouldn't give up a little more, that I wouldn't struggle even longer (because there are less job opps in their area).  I wish I had an answer - and that I could stop looking back at all the series of choices that have put my in this place that I'm in today...

  • 10:38 am
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